


Battle, my love

by Kthsbot



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Bottom Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd, CF Dimlix, Emotional Sex, Felix can top as a treat, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-03
Updated: 2020-12-03
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:34:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27864669
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kthsbot/pseuds/Kthsbot
Summary: Dimitri wants to hear how much Felix loves him, Felix surrnders easily.
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Felix Hugo Fraldarius
Comments: 6
Kudos: 29





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> NSFW is in the second chapter, the title [song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rikvdA_eaLA&ab_channel=CircaSurvive-Topic)

The fire crackling sound is just as peaceful in the dark night as Dimitri hoped it would be, so much so Dimitri forgets they’re in an endless war. He is stripped down from his armor and gauntlets when his hand reaches for the flames, he had longed for it through his day, for its warmth to emit on his face. It reminds him of his childhood days when he’d listen to his father’s tellings while anticipation drew on his face with the easy happiness for the triumphed tales. 

He doesn’t remember the last time he has felt that wholeheartedly joy, he’d do anything for just one of those old days. Maybe it’ll happen sooner than he thinks, he can’t wait for tomorrow, for him to take down the one who stole all of it away from him. 

The sudden door creak stirs Dimitri from his head, his eyes are quick to cast on the familiar shade, Felix enters and seals the door behind him, yanking up his sword to the ground, the loud thudding with the landing breaks the peace. 

Felix doesn’t look angry or out of a fight like most of the days. Instead, he silently takes off his cape, the blue of Blaiddyd and the green of Fraldarius are in contrast on their bed. These days Felix doesn’t even bother and retreat to his room anymore, he has also ceased arguing with Dimitri or the other nobles for matters related to the country. It weighs heavy on Dimitri, how Felix appears to give in to war, or the way he stares wearily at anything and nothing. Dimitri notices how much Felix has been visiting Glenn’s and Rodrigue's graves. Felix has surrendered to the truth, they’re doomed and Dimitri can do _nothing_.

When Felix doesn’t unbutton his shirt, Dimitri’s eyes return to the campfire waiting for the swordsman to join him and plant himself to Dimitri’s side, they can enjoy one last evening. 

“You’ve skipped dinner,” comes Felix’s voice, warning and close, Dimitri wants to hear it next to his ear, surrounding him. 

Dimitri drones, but his eyes don’t tear from the blaze in front of him, “Sylvain is coming with reinforcement, that’s good news. You should celebrate that.” Felix’s voice is lastly above his ears, Dimitri makes space for him on the divan, he takes in the scent of Felix as he sits next to him, paired with something else, he turns to him, and Felix has his hands full, holding a plate with a spoon. 

Dimitri’s mouth is ajar. Whenever Felix carries out such acts as if he cares about Dimitri’s wellbeing, Dimitri’s guilt swells within him. He is incapable of welcoming Felix with anything, he is unable to return the debts, immense favors, Felix keeps throwing at him. He has a broken kingdom, and a promise for death tomorrow, he wishes he could offer anything more to him. 

He wishes Felix had left when he could. 

“You’re hopeless without me you know, I don’t need to worry about your health too.” Felix hums the words, while he feeds Dimitri a spoon, and Felix is right. 

Dimitri doesn’t take it to his mouth, instead, he mutters against the steel, “why,” his eyes instantly meet the way Felix’s are coated with annoyance, his mouth thins and he sets the spoon down the plate between his hands and places it somewhere else. 

Beautiful, Felix is under the dim blaze, his eyes are that of its color, fuming the way fire is when it’s angry, or dull and peaceful like now, just looking at Dimitri. Dimitri loves them, he admires the red when it’s against the dark silky strands of Felix, colliding with his faint calm skin, Felix is who authors write about for young princesses, and princes, beautiful like dawn and bewitching like the sunset. 

“What do you mean, ‘why’” Felix says, unimpressed like they’ve been through this many times as if Dimitri should be knowing, and Dimitri is only afraid to fury him. 

“Why are you by my side,” _when you can be somewhere better._ Dimitri’s voice is heavy with anguish when he asks, his breath is hesitant and his hands search through for something to cling on, instead of Felix.

“You know why,” Felix answers with a pointed look like it’s easy as if he is an open book. Strangely, Dimitri misses when Felix yells at him, tells him to shut up and not ask such nonsense. 

“I know why,” Dimitri echos. He knows, what he thinks is the gist of it at least: Felix wanted to complete Rodurige’s mission, to make certain his blood isn’t in vain, to ensure that Dimitri is a worthy king, and Dimitri wouldn’t object when it meant having Felix to himself. 

Except, one glance from Felix tells him his guess is wrong. Felix always sees through him, “You really don’t know,” he grimaces, and before Felix attempts to get to his feet, as he does most time and leaves Dimitri alone, questions hang in the air. Dimitri seizes his wrist between his fingers, he’ll be damned if he doesn’t have his answer before tomorrow, “tell me,” he whispers, his gaze traps Felix’s and drags Felix to sit on his thighs, the long legs spread above the muscles of them. 

They’re a heartbeat away from each other, Felix doesn’t waste time, even when he glares daggers at Dimitri. Felix kisses him like there is more than tomorrow awaiting them. He doesn’t let Dimitri run his tongue through his lips to part them effortlessly, he leaves Dimitri to chase after them. Felix separates their bodies easily, although, his eyes crave for another kiss while he utters, “you know now.” 

It’s not enough for Dimitri, they’ve kissed plenty; he needs to know. He squeezes at Felix’s wrist, and his fingers stay clutched around it. “No, I want to hear it. I want to hear you speak it, so I can die in peace.” he almost begs, voice hitching under the sharp gaze Felix pins him with. Dimitri knows if he pronounces any more, he’ll break. 

“I’m leaving if you are going to speak of your death as if it’s in your plans tomorrow, I’ll not feed into this,” he yanks his hand free from Dimitri’s hold and turns his face away from Dimitri’s view. The darkness crawls around them, but Dimitri isn’t blind. Felix’s eyes glisten with tears, clenching Dimitri’s chest when he sees him so miserable, “I apologize, I- I don’t know anything but upsetting you-” He shakes his head as he speaks.

“I thought you understood, from the day I oathed to you, boar. I knew the kingdom is doomed against the empire, more than that... I knew if I left, I would be just as damned.” Felix cuts Dimitri’s words, his words piercing through Dimitri’s self-loathing. If Dimitri puts the pieces Felix throws at him now and then together, he’d think Felix loves him. 

Dimitri remembers the day Felix oathed to him distinctly. It happened after Felix had taken an arrow for Dimitri. It would’ve been fatal at Dimitri’s heart if it hit him, but Felix came to rescue. Dimitri had uncaringly kissed him then, crashed their lips and teeth together at the battleground. Within the rush, Felix had opened his mouth for him and let the king take from him until he whispered for Dimitri to name him his shield. 

“Felix you can still run, run far and away, you’ll have a beautiful family and with your skills, you’ll earn money quickly.” Dimitri insists, his hands finding Felix’s warm ones to tug on, to affirm that it’s alright if he does, if Dimitri wakes up tomorrow morning with an empty bed, cold at his side, he’d understand. Dimitri’s vengeance belongs to him and him only. If he can save the person he cares for the most, he will attempt to. 

Even if the thought jabs at his heart, or the air thins within his words.

“Don’t you dare and insult my oath. I said it then and I’ll say it again, until death has me, I’m yours.” Felix tangles their fingers together, only it’s hard to believe when Felix has been cursing Fearghus and its knighthood for ages, “we’ve walked the same path, I’m not letting you go down now without a fight. I know how much you fear the fall, boar. I’m here to help you land.” Felix’s voice is strong, offering Dimitri a hand to reach for and ground on. He is ever honest, so Dimitri asks again, desperate for an answer, “just, why?” _You deserve better_ , he wants to finish and he laments under Felix’s gaze, voice wavering like a sick dog. 

“Because I want to, Dimitri. It might surprise you but that’s the only reasoning behind it.” He says, unfamiliarly gentle, Dimitri’s name tastes sweet on his lips. Dimitri wishes that he had known earlier to this, that’s all it takes to soften the sharp edges of his former best friend. 

_Name me your shield_ , Felix said to him, _I might resent you but I won’t leave you to death, you’re mine._ He said when Dimitri attempted to dispute his request, refusing to drag Felix through this path.

 _Because I want to, Dimitri,_ the words ring in Dimitri’s head.

It clicks in as Dimitri dwells on Felix’s soft-spoken words, their hands locked together and all of their nights spent in his chambers, “because you love me,” he mutters like it’s a revelation, striving to believe it. It’s easier when Felix cradles his fingers between Dimitri’s hair and brings him for another kiss, “because I love you,” Felix repeats against his lips before he seals their mouths together, and oh, how it makes Dimitri happy.

Felix gave him everything that he doesn’t care if they won’t see tomorrow’s light or if it is their goodbye anymore.

Dimitri pretends he doesn’t see the soft smile tugging at the end of Felix’s lips, it’s hard to when he hasn’t seen it in more than a decade, so he presses his lips at the edge of Felix’s mouth, just to make certain it’s there. “Tell me again,” Dimitri demands, because he wants to watch Felix smile again, because no matter how much Felix will say it, Dimitri won’t believe it; won’t get tired of trying to. 

“Earn it,” Felix whispers, and smirks filthy, pressing against his ear, “earn it and let me kiss you this way tomorrow, when we’re victorious.” 


	2. Chapter 2

“Will you... take care of me tonight?” Dimitri asks hesitantly, it surprises Felix how coy he can sound in that rough voice. Felix nods regardless, knowing what Dimitri craves tonight. They’ve been here enough time for him to recognize the plead in the deep blue eyes; asking to be ruined with tears, and Felix can’t wait to make him cry out of pleasure. 

They move to the bed, Dimitri loses more of his clothes on their way there and Felix can’t hold back the lingering gaze on the back of his king’s body, scars glazing his skin, down to the small curve of his waist, he wants to reach out and touch them or kiss on them. He hasn’t allowed himself to do so before, he thought they had time for Dimitri to be better, for Felix to accept his feelings for him, and for them to fall back together. Instead, they barely have the night for one last memory. 

Dimitri sits down and takes off his boot, he doesn’t wait for Felix to demand his pants off too, they readily fall on the floor- Dimitri even picks them to tide them up. Felix watches intently, eyes following the exposed skin, and looks back at Dimitri’s face, to make certain he knows that Felix wants this just as badly. 

He approaches Dimitri, kneeling on one knee beside Dimitri, his fingers trace on his skin and hook around the inner of Dimitri's calf taking it in his hand, he hears the breath that leaves Dimitri and feels him shiver. Felix leans in and kisses up the calloused skin, his fingers rising slowly, covering Dimitri’s bare thighs, Dimitri flinches strangely under his touch. 

“Felix, what are you doing,” Dimitri murmurs, the pride of a king has ceased, and when Felix meets his gaze, Dimitri is entirely flushed, a hand has been running through his hair messily. “What does it look like, boar,” Felix says all too softly, keeps on brushing his lips against the sensitive skin while locking their eyes. “Please, just get done with it, I don’t deserve such kindness.” the edge of Dimitri’s voice roughens and Felix frowns at that.

“Is that so?” 

“I’m a monster Felix,” He whimpers the words, trying desperately not to believe them, and Felix’s chest clenches at the thought. How many times have they done this and Dimitri thought Felix didn’t touch him tenderly because he is some kind of a beast. After all, that’s what Felix has been calling him for years. All of their shared nights have been quick relief, rough, and without any acknowledgment. 

“All of us are,” He affirms, not only to Dimitri but himself too. War turned them into monsters, and with time Felix understood Dimitri. He was hard on him; lavishing right and left whenever he spotted him. It turns out, it’s not Dimitri that chose to be this way. And having Dimitri between his arms, under him or in him, reminds the both of them how they remain human.

“No, I- I turned you all to this. I’m a poor excuse of a man, I’m a beast, Felix,” his voice hitches, almost breaking into sobs. It almost makes Felix angry and maybe if they didn’t have a battle the day after, he would’ve stopped to chide and be the Felix he has been for Dimitri for long. The one that curses when Dimitri doesn’t act the way he wants him to, the way he’s known him for. 

It took a war for him to understand that Dimitri, the strongest man to walk on Faerghus, is only fragile, not insane. 

Now, instead, Felix gets to his feet and pulls Dimitri’s face to kiss him, once, Dimitri shudders, twice and Felix smiles against his lips, it upsets him how tender he can be with Dimitri, how much he cares for him and needs him to feel it instantly, “it takes one to devote to another.” He whispers, for Dimitri to cradle his fingers between Felix’s tied strands in protest, bringing him for another kiss, long and tender, opening his mouth willingly and just asking for more of Felix. His arm wraps around Felix’s waist, tight and secure, refusing to let go.

They fall for a rhythm Felix kissing Dimitri, around his face and on his chest and Dimitri stripping him from his clothes, gasping ‘come one,’ over and over to Felix, bringing him on the top of his body, strong arms move him without effort and Felix loves his strength. It terrified him when he was younger, he loathed him for it. 

Felix’s hand brushes over Dimitri’s breeches, teasing upon the tip making Dimitri groan, “Don't be cruel with your king,” Dimitri urges, with an arm thrown to cover most of his face, he doesn’t even attempt to touch himself; just wanting to be good. Felix smiles, “nothing the tempest king can’t handle.” He hears something near a muffled chuckle and orders Dimitri not to hide his face.

“Please, it’s embarrassing.” he chokes out, _“How worked up you get when I start touching you?”_ Felix wants to ask but instead, he demands again for his arm to be away. If he says he wants it gone because nothing more than Dimitri’s face blissed drives him crazy, Dimitri won’t shut up about Felix being a liar.

By the time Felix fetches some oil, Dimitri lies naked on the bed, not touching himself and only waiting for Felix, already anticipating his fingers, Dimitri spreads his thighs and Felix smirks at the sight. 

He hurries to his side, starting with one finger since he knows how tight Dimitri could be, Felix is the only one who knows that, the only one who has the right to. Of course, neither of them have ever discussed courting or marriage, but it was a silent agreement to not have anyone but each other. Felix won’t have it any other way.

He presses a finger into the inviting heat, listening to Dimitri’s breath hitch. He casts his gaze on Dimitri’s body, tense while he turns his head away from Felix’s eyes. Felix’s hand reaches to hold Dimitri’s chin and forces him to watch his face, Felix wants to see the blue eyes as he thrusts his fingers in again and again. “Majesty,” Felix whispers as his finger pin Dimitri’s chin towards him. 

_“Felix...”_

Once Dimitri’s eyes are on him, Felix buries in his finger, pleased with the low moans escaping the king. He attempts to crook his finger, only for Dimitri to tighten up and twitch inside, his hands come to grip at his shoulders for some grounding and Felix just wants to tease him more, only he is hard as a rock. 

When Felix circles the rim with another finger, Dimitri whimpers, the sound going straight to Felix’s cock. He grasps Dimitri’s wrist and brings Dimitri’s finger around his entrance, “see how tight you are for me?” He murmurs and flicks his gaze to Dimitri. Dimitri who has red flare to the tips of his ears, worrying his lips between his teeth for an attempt to keep his moans down, too bad Felix isn’t in the mood for silence. 

“Dimitri, what do you say for another finger?” Felix’s eyes bore into him, swallowing his own moans as Dimitri twitches for him. 

“ _Please…_ ” he pleads, and Felix has to hold for anything not to give Dimitri everything he wants at once. 

“Good boy.” 

He pushes another finger in, and Dimitri whines, a sound Felix could never get enough of. He knew as soon as he started pumping his fingers in, he’d hear more, especially when Dimitri attempts at saying Felix’s name, just for random syllables to be spitting out and _oh_ , he looks beautiful, so beautiful filled with _Felix’s_ fingers, his mouth dropped open from pleasure, and Felix just wants to shove himself into the tight heat. 

Felix doesn’t make him beg for more, although it’s no denying how thrilling to see the king say please over and over just for short bliss. Felix wants to be gentle for Dimitri, he rarely is and he wants this to be special, for Dimitri to believe him when Felix says he loves him - because they might just not have another time for that.

Because Felix is terrified of what tomorrow means, and he knows Dimitri is too. 

He pumps his fingers in, adding another one when Dimitri sobs, ‘more,’ repeatedly. Felix promised he’d take care of him.

He ignores the place he is supposed to hit, the one that drives Dimitri to the hilt. He shoves his fingers deep, picking up the pace while his other hand fumbles through his underclothes to take them off. He wouldn’t make the king wait for more. 

He catches Dimitri staring down with his eyes half-lidded, running a tongue on his lips while Felix slicks himself and Felix finds himself grinning, “oh, Felix,” Dimitri returns the smile with a sigh, shivering and squeezing his eyes shut as if looking at Felix is overwhelming him. “Want this... Badly,” he chokes on his words as Felix scissors him some more, if only Dimitri knew how much Felix imagined this, thought about it even before they started their little arrangements, even in their academy days. 

When Felix sees that Dimitri is ready, he draws back his fingers, watching as Dimitri’s hole twitches at the emptiness, and a shared groan springs from both of them. Felix climbs to Dimitri’s chest, kissing and biting everywhere he can get his mouth on. He brushes the filthy fingers, the ones that were just in Dimitri’s hole, on the king’s lips, “taste yourself for me,” Felix groans, and Dimitri obliges lewdly, lapping his tongue around the fingers Felix offers. 

Felix decides this is enough teasing for them, he can’t hold back anymore, he has neither the patience nor the power to do so. He isn’t Dimitri who had Felix writhing too many times. He really should applause for Dimitri, because if Felix doesn’t put his dick in him now, he might burst. 

The second Felix thrusts in, Dimitri is nearly sobbing between his arms, a burst of pleads comes from him, he repeats ‘don’t let go of me,’ like a prayer against Felix’s cheek, and Felix could never. He thinks as he gently kisses Dimitri’s temple. 

“‘mitri, my Dimitri,” He murmurs to the naked skin, brushing his lips over his nape until he buries his face in the scent of Dimitri, marking his neck possessively. He looks at where they’re connected and shudders at the sight, Dimitri is still impossibly tight. Felix grinds his cock a little deeper that makes Dimitri wail, and mumble some broken words. 

Felix stops to hear them, but Dimitri whimpers impatiently. He grabs Dimitri’s chin again. “I didn’t catch that,” Felix pants. 

“Tell me again,” Dimitri’s voice tapers off hesitantly, but Felix is so deep into his hole that he has no clue what Dimitri is talking about, Dimitri looks at him openly, eyes glistening with tears and vulnerability, Felix almost raises a questioning brow. “You said, If- If I earned it,” Dimitri whispers, almost achingly.

_Oh._

Felix feels his knees going weak. His eyes lock with Dimitri’s glazed ones, he looks in need of Felix, eyes yearning for him, for his words. Dimitri’s hands reach to tug Felix’s strands behind his ears, that’s when Felix realizes that he is tearing up too. Is it because Dimitri needs him or is it because he didn’t understand how much those words mean for both of them. Maybe because he’s only seen Dimitri as a walking corpse, but now, and only in these times he seems alive. 

Dimitri looks hurt as if seeing Felix’s tears pains him. He threads his fingers in Felix’s hair, freeing them from the ribbon that barely holds anything still. Dimitri stares at him mesmerized , playing with the ends of the fallen strands, “tell me, Felix.” 

And Felix wants to tell him everything; from when they were children and the heat would rush to him as Dimitri kissed his cheeks goodbye, how he would practice kissing on the training dummies to make certain their first kiss was as good as their duels. How thin the line was between loving Dimitri and hating him and how hard it was not to cross it. That he’d empty his stomach every battle Dimitri would fall injured. He wanted to tell Dimitri about it all, he wanted to tell him about another Felix, who wasn’t too coward to help Dimitri after the rebellion battle, who wasn’t scared of what became of Dimitri. He wanted to tell him that Felix isn’t crazy for staying with him, for believing they’d win. 

But mostly, he wanted to tell Dimitri that he loved him, and he is sorry for being late. 

“Love you,” Felix whispers breathlessly, his gaze not parting from Dimitri’s, not when a smile has finally shaped his handsome face. He started moving inside Dimitri again, thrusting deeper into him. 

“Again,” Dimitri pants, both overwhelmed and relieved. Felix drives deeper, watching Dimitri’s mouth fall in ecstasy, he can’t hold the urge to wipe the drool under the soft curve of his lips. “Tell me again. Felix, tell me again, please.” Dimitri whines, Felix has never seen him so open. 

“I love you, Dimitri, Goddess, I’ve loved you.” and Dimitri tightens so deliciously as the words spill, His name falls easily now over Felix’s lips, drilling into Dimitri’s memory. 

Felix remembers when Dimitri wouldn’t let him come until he said his name till his voice was gone. 

“Again, again Fe-” 

“Love you, how did you not know that I love you.” Felix groans into Dimitri’s neck, burying himself over and over again, grinding deeper and hitting Dimitri’s spot. 

The sounds Dimitri has made before fell compared to this. Loud and lewd, Felix’s cock throbs at it and he has to stop for a breath before he comes too soon. Was it the spot or his words that made Dimitri break tonight? 

Or was it the knowledge that they’ll be dead by noon the next day? 

Felix hugs possessively at Dimitri’s waist, he doesn’t know who he is grounding anymore. All he knows is that Dimitri’s body is under him, warm and alive, so is Felix. He hopes Dimitri is only thinking of their bodies, not tomorrow. 

Felix rocks harder, drives deeper and knows they’re both close by the way Dimitri shakes, squeezes around him. He drinks in how Dimitri takes him, watches his face streaked with tears and some still threatening to fall, Felix knows they will so he leans in, kisses him long and deep, enough to leave Dimitri breathless and wanting more.

“I want to- I want to live.” I want to live with you Felix, it’s unfair, Fe.” Dimitri starts babbling, he dwells on ‘it’s unfair’, echoing it between moans and shouts, Felix knows he is out of it, hips not stopping, Felix hisses, “Fuck! Dimitri, fuck.” 

It’s Dimitri that comes first, leaving Felix to chase his relief, grinding harder when Dimitri tells him to come inside because he desperately wants to feel everything Felix can offer. It would be a shame if he didn’t taint him, Felix thinks as he comes. 

The last of Dimitri’s tears fall gracefully, like everything in Dimitri. Felix watches them, his gaze trails to where they’re still connected. “Are you alright?” Felix asks, shifting against him to pull out, except Dimitri holds his hips still. “Don’t,” he whispers, his voice hoarse from shouting, “not yet… want to feel you some more.” Felix feels his cock twitch in interest at the words, he sighs and runs his thumb against Dimitri’s sharp cheekbones, wiping away the fresh tears. “Are you okay?” He repeats the question because Dimitri looks _ruined_ , beautifully so, and he doesn’t spare Felix a gaze, he only stares at the ceiling. When Felix finally gets a nod, he doesn’t push it.

Then, Dimitri brings Felix’s palm against his lips, kisses it softly, breath hot on it that Felix feels the tip of his ears crimson, and knows that Dimitri feels him inside as he smiles lazily. Felix’s heart pulses swiftly in his chest. He slips the palm into his hands, caressing over the rugged knuckles. 

“I must look an awful sight,” Dimitri murmurs, crawling closer to Felix’s side, to hide perhaps or seek Felix’s warmth, Felix likes to think at least. Felix shakes his head, smiling down at him and pulls Dimitri’s face for a longing kiss, “you never looked better,” He makes certain Dimitri believes him, locking their eyes together, and something in Dimitri’s blue ones gleams, like the sun after a never-ending winter. “I like you like this, not the king, just...” _Mine_. Felix wants to say. 

Dimitri doesn’t demand the rest, he only smiles gently as if he understands. Of course, he does, if anyone could understand him without speaking, it’s Dimitri. “When _you_ say it, I might just believe it, Felix, you’re never the liar.” Dimitri slurs upon his neck and between the press of his lips against the skin. 

_Is that why you wanted me to tell you, I love you?_ If Dimitri won’t believe that he is loved unless Felix tells him, then Felix will have to do just that- If only he didn’t wait so long. He’ll have to tell Dimitri in the morning, before breakfast and after it, before the battle and; as long as there is after, Felix will keep on telling him. His feelings don’t terrify him anymore, not the way they did at the academy, loving Dimitri isn’t scary anymore, but losing him- 

What is that they say about warriors? They fear love more than death. Felix manages to fear both.

Before Felix asks Dimitri to wait for him to clean them up, Dimitri nestles his head on Felix’s chest, eyes closed slipping to sleep, and Felix doesn’t have the heart to move him when he looks so peaceful. Felix has to halt his mind from pondering over how he will look in the daylight tomorrow, drained with soldiers’ blood, for nothing. Everyone knows how awful they’re behind the empire, the kingdom’s troops aren’t even half their numbers. 

Yet, Felix has faith in them, or maybe it’s just love. It’s just the need to see Dimitri alive and well after the battle. Felix will be damned if he witnessed the death of another one of his family. 

He knows the odds aren’t in their favor, but if he stands beside Dimitri, who will dare touch the king? He remembers when they’re in battles, in desperate need for reinforcements and drunk on fear, he remembers Dimitri crushing battalions alone. He remembers kissing him after too, harsh and cruel. 

Maybe they should run away, leave the country and never look back. 

He chuckles to himself, _like hell he would stay for duty._

He hugs Dimitri tighter against his body, his scent engulfing him, Felix clings to it. His fingers are already finding their way between the blonde curtains, combing and tangling the silk hair. If Felix decides to stay awake to gaze at Dimitri’s body, the rise and fall of his chest, and the glimpse of blonder hair covering it, he doesn’t acknowledge it. 

“Tomorrow we shall claim our victory.” He whispers and presses his lips against Dimitri’s head. 

When the sun rises, Felix watches as the light falls gentle on the golden hair, he watches as Dimitri’s lashes flutter open. 

He promises himself it’s not the last time he does. 

**Author's Note:**

> I maybe or maybe not developed an 'I love you' kink writing this.


End file.
